Posted on 12/21/2016
Extravagance can be a way to show your children love, but it can also keep you from being in-the-moment and keeping the peace, both throughout the month of December and beyond. When we strap ourselves financially, extend past natural limitations of finances, energy, and time, we’re more likely to be short on love and long on longing for another stage of life, another life altogether. If parenting through the holiday season fills you with anxiety and a desire to just skip them or escape altogether, then it’s time to re-evaluate how you celebrate.
It’s. Just. One. Month.
Give or take, the time we often refer to “the holidays” typically extends about a month. Maybe longer, if you consider it from Thanksgiving at the end of November through New Year’s Day. But still, it’s about a month, give or take. Not nearly 3 months, like summer “vacation,” but a single month. Even still, that season we call “the holidays” looms large on our calendars and our minds, does it not? And we start feeling like we have to think about it starting in September, thanks to retailers everywhere. But for all the commercials and traditions and extra events, we just have 31 days in December, no more than any other month. None of us get any more days nor any more hours in each day than we do any other month. That includes us parents. So let’s start out realizing that we can’t realistically expect any more from ourselves (or our kiddos) than we do any other month.
Plan Ahead, or Don’t
Some parents may find it freeing to complete their holiday shopping and planning before December begins. Others find it more fun to wait until December and only include what can realistically fit into that month. One area where almost all of us have to plan is finances. Is an over-the-top holiday really worth going into debt? Um, no. But could it be worth getting an extra seasonal job that can help you afford to celebrate the way you’d really like? Maybe, depending on your other commitments and your season of life.
Make It Your Own
We hear it all the time, that thing about comparison being the thief of joy, but it’s true! And if we’re not going to let our holiday joy be stolen, then we need to campaign against it and make plans to keep it from ruining your holiday season. Remind yourself: Whatever you do, it’s okay. If you just do gift cards and complete all your shopping in an hour, great. If you choose just one tangible gift or an experience, instead, for your children, that’s fine. If you don’t change your home’s décor or include a single baking session or photo session of your kids, you’re still okay. If you really want to cut down your own tree and shower your kids with gifts and make cookies for the entire block and host an incredible holiday gathering, and you can pull it all off with a sincere smile, that’s great, too.
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